Grieving Through the Holidays
The ‘most wonderful time of the year’ is not always such a joyful time. Inevitably, the holidays bring up memories from the past. Memories of tender moments shared with loved ones who may no longer be in our lives or even with us on earth. A song might remind you of someone’s smile or the smell of gingerbread transports you to your mother’s kitchen. Sometimes, it’s seeing little things in your everyday life that you know that particular person would enjoy. You pick up the phone to call him or her only to realize that you can no longer do so. All of these things (and many more!) can flood the mind with painful reminders of what’s been lost.
Contrary to popular belief, time may not heal all wounds. Significant loss, such as the loss of a loved one due to death or divorce/break-up, can take a minimum of two years to heal. Indeed, for some, the process is much, much longer. As well, we can add to our suffering by thinking that we should be over a loss by a certain time frame.
Embrace Your Emotions
It’s common to experience waves of emotion as you grieve. Emotions that ebb and flow—especially during the holiday season. It’s healthy to allow these feelings to rise and fall in their natural rhythms. It takes inner strength to accept your vulnerability and not try to bury or erase whatever comes up. Watch your thoughts and breathe through the emotions and know that you are not alone in your sorrow, even though it might feel that way.
The holidays are infused with everyday miracles and mystery. May you experience the inner peace and radiant love that is the birthright of every living being on the planet. Joy and sorrow are as natural as each inhalation and exhalation that you take. Honour and accept the grieving process as it uniquely unfolds for you. It is a sacred process that is truly healing.
“And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always accepted the seasons that pass over your fields. And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief.” ~Kahlil Gibran
© Copyright 2010 Holly Wilson
Author Bio: Holly Wilson is a freelance writer/editor and stay-at-home mom. You may contact Holly at holly@ecoerth.com. If you liked this article, please share it on Facebook, Twitter, StumbleUpon, etc.☮
Great article Holly! Yes Christmas can be hard on many, but I find after the holidays is when it hits me. It is such a build up of excitement and party’s, friends and family, then nothing. All the gifts and the excitement of giving them and receiving, then nothing. All the pretty decorations and Christmas songs (which I personaly sing all year long), then nothing. Even the snow as it falls is so pretty and magical, when Christmas is over, I HATE IT! Anyway Love you see you over the holidays and after too (lots) I hope.